Reading through this for the first time (somehow I missed when the first draft was posted), and I have to say, I love the concept and I really love the setting. I have to admit, I am confused as to who the people are. How many people work in the office overall? Is there any way to give more of a shape of scale/office positions sooner? Even if it's metatextual? For me personally, I can only remember Roxy's, Ian's, and Erin's positions for sure. Also, I feel like multiple women have hairstyles that are falling down.
no subject
Date: 2010-10-04 05:17 am (UTC)