I'm enjoying this a lot. A lot lot. It reads more smoothly, and it hints that this strange world you describe is bigger than just those words. The only thing I have a bit of trouble with is the second chapter. It feels that there are repetitions of the same idea, that it doesn't flows as easily as the other parts.
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Date: 2011-06-23 09:11 am (UTC)The only thing I have a bit of trouble with is the second chapter. It feels that there are repetitions of the same idea, that it doesn't flows as easily as the other parts.