So, I’m loving this again, though it’s weird to be watching the third incarnation of a story unfold. Weird but good. I LOVE watching the details, tracing (hahaha) out ideas that were little flickers, KNOWING that things are different this time and being able to get my hands on them and think about what these early changes will mean for the future. Like the woman that keeps appearing for Colin :D Pretty sure I know who that is, but I also think it would be pretty subtle if I HADN’T read the thing before.
Lovely tightening of the exposition, and I’m excited about continuing! Don’t feel like much help with editing, but at the same time if there’s no problems I can talk about clearly enough to critique, that’s pretty sweet.
Oh! I also love Colin’s relationship with Analise and Joseph. Or rather, last time I didn’t really believe it but this time…yeah, and part of it are strong and deep as a river, and some are tenuous like a spider’s web and all very strange but human and driven and much enjoyable.
Also to be giving silly late comments. Turned out not to be a week where I felt like reading a prison epic…*sigh
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Date: 2011-06-24 10:36 pm (UTC)Lovely tightening of the exposition, and I’m excited about continuing! Don’t feel like much help with editing, but at the same time if there’s no problems I can talk about clearly enough to critique, that’s pretty sweet.
Oh! I also love Colin’s relationship with Analise and Joseph. Or rather, last time I didn’t really believe it but this time…yeah, and part of it are strong and deep as a river, and some are tenuous like a spider’s web and all very strange but human and driven and much enjoyable.
Also to be giving silly late comments. Turned out not to be a week where I felt like reading a prison epic…*sigh